Having a low opnion of yourself is not modesty, it is self destruction.” -Bobby Sommer

We live in a world dictated by the standards of our society. While laws and social structure is important and keeps us human, compassionate and accountable for our actions, society also tends to impose certain standards on us that break down our confidence and leave us feeling desolate and empty. In such adversity, it is usually difficult for us to continue moving and we become paralyzed and heartbroken and can no longer be as productive as we would want to be. It is important to understand that the world is a cruel place and there is no such thing as fair play in it and if you want to achieve something in life you will have to rise above everything that is holding you down and you can only do that by becoming internally secure and rebuilding your broken confidence. Maxwell Maltz has summed it all up quite candidly by saying,

“Low self esteem is like driving through life with your hand break on.”

And so, hoping to help you restore your confidence we’ve decided to give you a few tips on restoring your self-esteem.

10. Come to terms with your insecurities:

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Is there something about you that you don’t like? Is it making you insecure about yourself? Does it make you stand out, does it make you feel different? It is important to understand that not everything about you that makes you different is a flaw. We are each created differently with different sets of skills and different qualities. I remember reading a quote from Game Of Thrones by Tyrion Lannister, it carries a resilient quality but there’s something very about it also.

Never forget what you are, the rest of the world will not. Wear it like an armor and it can never be used against you.

9. Find out where you’re going in life:

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Sometimes one of the causes of our low self-esteem is our lack of direction in life. We have no idea where our life is going and where we want it to go. Deciding on a clear goal helps us find peace and it takes away the fear of the future, it also gives us something to work for and directs our mind towards positive thoughts.

8. Find someone who has been through the same things you have:

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There are several successful human beings around us. Most of them overcome their fears and have paved their ways towards success. Follow the example of such a person and maneuver through your difficulties by handling everything the way they have.

7. Figure out the difference between fake confidence and true confidence:

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You’ve probably come across a whole bunch of delusional people in your life. They believe they can’t do anything wrong and aren’t ready to come off their high horses long enough to give a damn about the other person opinion. A person who exhibits the behavior of this sort is clearly a psycho. He or she isn’t confident, they simply live in an all-encompassing bubble. True confidence is humble and it moves you forward willing you to do more.

6. Confidence is a by-product of failure:

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There is no such thing as genetically acquired brilliance. Sure some people are born more intelligent than others and some are sharper, but that doesn’t mean that you can have it all, all thanks to your genes. We grow with the magnitudes of the task that are assigned to us and through continues failure, we learn to truly succeed. And only by failing again and again do we become more confident in ourselves. Confidence acquired from failing is confidence earned. This kind of confidence is true confidence and stays with us despite whatever storm we have to weather.

5. Engage in exercise:

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Jillian Micheal has fine set of quotes on confidence, she says,

When you see how strong you are physically. It will transcend into every facet of your life.

And she’s right! If your body is strong and fit and you look good in the mirror every day, you’ll feel ten times more confident when you walk out the door.

4. Create a stress-free safe haven:

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Make sure that your house is a place you can unwind and calm down. It should be a place you feel secure and safe. People who are usually happy and have a good and successful career have a good home life. If you live alone, make sure you spend time doing a favorite activity of yours and if you don’t make sure the partner you come home too is comforting and kind and isn’t in himself or herself a source of anxiety.

3. Look at the world how it is, not how you want it to be:

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Having a clear conception of the world around you is important. If you continue to look at it from an overly pessimistic or even an overly optimistic point of view, you’ll end up getting disappointed. It’s important to look at the world how it is, you can’t go around telling yourself you’ll climb Mount Everest without any training because of sheer will and you can’t keep telling yourself that your boss is out to get you when evidence proves he or she isn’t.

2. Take care of yourself:

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Indulge in yourself once in a while, go to a spa, grab a fancy dinner, eat some ice-cream, after all, you can’t be happy if you aren’t paying any attention to yourself and you most certainly can’t be happy and if you aren’t happy you most certainly can’t be confident.

1. Have the courage to accept your mistakes:

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Being humble can take you places. If you are ready to accept your mistakes you’ll see that the next time your standing among people trying to defend an idea or believe you’ll be a lot more confident. You won’t be insecure like a person who is constantly trying to prove himself right. Remember the truth sets you free.

Article by Born Realist